{"id":6411,"date":"2018-09-15T20:59:49","date_gmt":"2018-09-15T19:59:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/embodiedfacilitator.com\/?p=6411"},"modified":"2021-06-21T09:38:32","modified_gmt":"2021-06-21T09:38:32","slug":"suffering-doesnt-help","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/suffering-doesnt-help\/","title":{"rendered":"Suffering doesn\u2019t help"},"content":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s a deeply held, implicit belief that we must suffer to grow. It\u2019s Judeo-Christian essentially, but has made its way into all aspects of bodymind practice and personal growth. Today, extreme hot yoga, mud runs (and similar) and ice training are some of the most popular methods of torturing oneself. Much of this practice has an almost S&M quality; numb people get addicted to extreme sensation, so they can feel again. The notion that it must<\/em> be doing some good if it\u2019s uncomfortable is hard to shake! Gentler practices remain unpopular, even when they give demonstrable results.<\/p>\n

This is the dark side of sacrifice. While there is often worth in giving something up (I frequently see people benefit more from my courses when there is a time\/energy\/financial commitment), suffering doesn\u2019t always create value! To suffer is not to benefit. I\u2019m thinking of starting Hell Yoga\u2122, where I pointlessly torture people to make some money and prove a point.<\/p>\n

This is not to say, of course, that challenge is a waste of time. Intensity that\u2019s carefully calibrated to people\u2019s skill (almost never done) can create a \u201csweet spot\u201d for learning self-regulation, discipline and the forging of one\u2019s will. I have done this; it has value for the soft, liberal, modern world, especially. However, simply suffering is not helpful. Most people I\u2019ve worked with use intensity to reinforce a narrative of low self-worth and punishment, to further disembody and avoid<\/em> coming home. More often, what is helpful is a gentle, forgiving listening, a returning home to the abandoned lover of the body. Fuck, it took me 20+ years of martial arts, extreme sports and kinky sex to work this out. It\u2019s deeply counter cultural.<\/p>\n

However, alongside the challenging, there is also a place for the occasionally unreasonable. I\u2019m glad that, as a young man, I pushed myself to insane edges. I would recommend this for the testosterone-driven and the very dedicated who wish to become professionals in their field. A few of us must descend into hell to steal fire from the Gods, but this is not sustainable or a healthy bodily norm.<\/p>\n

So be a rebel: don\u2019t push yourself. Delight in the pleasure of your body. Be fucking kind to yourself<\/em>. Gentle is the new extreme.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s a deeply held, implicit belief that we must suffer to grow. It\u2019s Judeo-Christian essentially, but has made its way into all aspects of bodymind practice and personal growth. Today, extreme hot yoga, mud runs (and similar) and ice training are some of the most popular methods of torturing oneself. Much of this practice has […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6412,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"give_campaign_id":0,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[185],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6411","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorised"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6411","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6411"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6411\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6412"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6411"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6411"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6411"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}