{"id":15534,"date":"2019-08-12T11:58:33","date_gmt":"2019-08-12T10:58:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/embodiedfacilitator.com\/?p=15534"},"modified":"2021-06-21T09:38:31","modified_gmt":"2021-06-21T09:38:31","slug":"learn-from-thy-enemy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/learn-from-thy-enemy\/","title":{"rendered":"Learn from thy enemy"},"content":{"rendered":"

Part of maturity is being able to see that which is beautiful and true, even in that which you despise, and even in that which has hurt you. As my mate Ken says, \u201cnobody is smart enough to be totally wrong\u201d.<\/span><\/p>\n

Having had some vicious and ironically unjust attacks from various social justice types over the last few years, I\u2019ve come to despise much in this movement. Having spent much time in ex-communist countries and heard about the gulags firsthand, I\u2019m not a fan of reworked Marxist ideologies…or fundamentalist religions of any kind actually, which is the feel of the movement more often than not. Having taught personal responsibility for years and found this central to empowerment and leadership I\u2019m not a fan of victim worship. Coming from an immigrant Irish family and far from ideal upbringing I have no tolerance for the racism of being told to shut up because of my skin colour. Having little love of academics I have no time for them redefining virtue by use of a special language code not actual behaviour. As a Buddhist, kindness is important to me and the SJW swamp is simply a \u201cpit of snakes\u201d more often than not (phrase from a senior social justice embodiment teacher I respect). As a fan of Western civilisation and individual rights I\u2019m not keen of those who want to \u201cdismantle\u201d it (to be replaced by what?). As a huge proponent of individual liberties I have no interest in a philosophy that dehumanises people to their group memberships (there\u2019s no justice at the group level, that\u2019s called \u201ccollective punishment\u201d in war btw and is outlawed by the UN). As an integralist I\u2019m suspicious of any worldview that doesn\u2019t encompass conservative and liberal truths, and holds back human evolution by seeing postmodernism as a peak achievement rather than a developmental stage. As someone committed to reason and civil discussion I have no time for those who have ideologically \u201cblocked all the exits\u201d and argue from who someone is not what their view is. As an internationalist I\u2019m loathe to take on a worldview from North America as applying equally globally (my Russian friends for example just laugh at SJWs in disbelief, class is a bigger factor in the UK than race, and SJWs sure as hell haven\u2019t lived in Ethiopia or Afghanistan). Practically, as someone genuinely trying to do good in the world I have had enough of those that only know how to criticise, publicly shame and tear things down. Haters are gonna inter-sectionalise innit.<\/span><\/p>\n

AND<\/span><\/p>\n

And here\u2019s the hard part for some of my conservative friends. The social justice people, while deep in their weird and often vicious cult, have a point. We do not all come from the same starts, or live under the same conditions. And while this is WAY more complex than just using the five allowed American categories, because there\u2019s untimely near infinite \u201csections\u201d and ways to be a minority (hands up gingers who were viciously bullied or good looking folks whose life is easier because of this \u201cprivilege\u201d), it IS both kind and fair to consider that we are not running in an even race. Things are loaded against certain kinds of people and we likely don\u2019t get what their experience is like unless we make efforts to. It IS worth considering your unfair advantages and trying to create a world where everyone gets a fair go. It IS good and noble to fight prejudice and discrimination. It IS important to understand where people are coming from in leadership, coaching, trauma and embodiment. It IS beautiful to love many kinds of people, cultures and backgrounds. I write this with tears in my eyes because these are central values to me too, which has ironically again made the attacks particularly painful. When called a \u201cNazi\u201d or \u201calt right\u201d there\u2019s a degree of being unseen for me that really hurts.<\/span><\/p>\n

For me what\u2019s been critical is re-owning my own shadow through therapeutic work and doing the necessary trauma healing. This continues but has got to the point where I can start to love my enemies… as a clever (likely) straight white male once suggested <\/span>\ud83d\ude09<\/span>\u00a0It\u2019s so easy to point fingers and be reactive from pain, and I pray the social justice world learns this before it trashes it\u2019s reputation utterly and eats itself alive. Pain creates more pain. Trauma, while understandable from those who have suffered, is repulsive not compelling. Threats, takedowns and bullying simply create resentment and backlash (are we all enjoying our leaders now???!!). It\u2019s like the core embodied teachings from everyone from Jesus to MLK has been ignored and replaced with angry righteous rhetoric, and this just doesn\u2019t help. If you want to win, heal.<\/span><\/p>\n

So apologies for utterly dismissing the social justice movement in my own pain, it\u2019s NOT full of shit and does have much to offer. Huge respect to those like\u00a0Rae Johnson<\/span><\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0Diane Hamilton<\/span><\/a>\u00a0who are involved in social justice issues from a kind, healing and integral perspective; and to those doing trauma work with social justice perspectives in mind (I\u2019m influenced by\u00a0Paul Linden<\/span><\/a>\u00a0as ever). I was just reading\u00a0David Treleaven<\/span><\/a>\u2019s excellent book on trauma sensitive mindfulness which comes out of a social justice perspective, and while I disagree with some of the worldview that\u2019s birthed it, the truths in it are just too important to let that get in the way for me. Now while David sure isn\u2019t an enemy I guess some of those he supports would consider me as such. This is sad and not a reason for me to push all of what they say away. The real courage in the modern world is not attacking people we disagree with, nor making a \u201cstand\u201d by distancing ourselves from them, de-platforming etc, but opening up emotionally and somatically and listening to them. Love thy enemy…sure; but learn from the fuckers. That\u2019s what\u2019s most vital now.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Part of maturity is being able to see that which is beautiful and true, even in that which you despise, and even in that which has hurt you. As my mate Ken says, \u201cnobody is smart enough to be totally wrong\u201d. Having had some vicious and ironically unjust attacks from various social justice types over […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":15537,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"give_campaign_id":0,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[185],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15534","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorised"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15534","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15534"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15534\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15537"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15534"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15534"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/embodimentunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15534"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}